Being in a loving relationship is one of the highlights of life. The two of you are in love, you are happiest when you are around your mate, and things seem to be going along just fine. Then it happens! Seemingly out of nowhere, your partner tells you that they want to break up with you. You are stunned, confused, hurt and angry. However, underneath all of those conflicting emotions, you still feel some enough love that you start to wonder how to win back an ex. With that in mind, here are some thoughts to help you patch things up and be back together with the person you love.
The first thing you should do is take some time to examine your personal feelings. Do you really want your ex back? What is it about them, specifically, that’s so important to your happiness? Is it possible you don’t love them so much as the way they made you feel? Can you get that same feeling from someone else in the future? All of these questions and more are important to answer as honestly as you can. If you fin that you really want to be with them again, then learning how to win back an ex is a smart move.
Now that you have your feelings figured out, it’s time to think about how your ex feels about you, or at least how they used to feel about you. See, the problem is that when we are deeply in love, it can cloud our judgment. You may have loved your ex so much that you never really considered that they treated you like dirt. Think back, and try to be objective as you can, as though you were an outside observer. How did your ex treat you? How did they show you love? Were they nice to you, or unnecessarily mean? This can be a hard exercise to go through, but it’s better to discover the truth now, than it is to chase after a romantic fantasy that will never come true.
Okay, now you have reached the point where it is clear you should move ahead with you plan to win back your ex. This will take work, but it will all be worthwhile if it means the two of you get back together again. What you need to do is more searching. What that means is that you need to dig down deep and get to the bottom of the problems that caused the two of you to break up. This can be tricky. For example, you may say that you broke up because the two of you would always argue. But arguing isn’t the cause of the problem, it’s a symptom. You need to dig deeper and find out what was causing it. Once you find the problems you can move on to the next step.
The final step for how to win back an ex is to come up with solutions for the problems. For those problems which can’t be undone (such as unfaithfulness) you have to be able to forgive and move forward. Doing all of these things will give you the best chance of getting back together for good.